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I just wanna be like something that is so good in the way how it need to be perform . I want it to become too well . I do not want it to be in such a terrible situation ever . Huh , what kind of life is this ? . I always think about that . I do not know about it in too detail because it is just too hard to being understandable by all people . Yeahhhhh , that is not my things . I should not even care about that . All of that is not belong to me . I just want to be calm and become happy in one beautiful day. Maybe after a few years i can . I can face it, i think . I have a confidence in my own self that My MiGhty God gonna show it 's greatness . I do not know how to elaborate it well . I actually only hoping for one thing . That thing is hidden very far away from my own self . I need to find it but i only can to do it after i already finished all my studies and after i already get a job . I need to have a patience . I need to have a lot of it . I need it too much because it is one of the way that i must take in order to keep being alive . It it maybe complicated . It is like a big messy trouble but yeah in order to make it become well enough , there should be something else , who will keep being survive with my own self . Sometimes , it can become as simple as it wants but sometimes it can become as hard as it wants . It is only because of a wants . It is something that is very hard . Even my own self , sometimes become lost of mind and heart . It is such a pain . I know about it . It is too hurt . Yeahhh , i agreed with a statement that told to me that " A sword is sharper than a word " . I totally agreed to that . It is something that is too hard for make it become under control . Huh , Sometimes i gonna be like something that is invisible like a wind . Just like how the wind keep being blown by itself , just like that how i gonna become . My own self is like the sand at beach , whenever there is a wave , i gonna being take to over there and over there . I do not know how and why . Haha . My own self is just like that. I only can keep on my hoping that i will successfully can make it become well again maybe in one bright day . I cannot wait to finish my study . I want to do a lot of another things . Hah , I just need to wait for it . Yes , i can do it right ? . Dear my lovely heart told to me to always remember that advice . So , yeah i can make it . Hah , just pray for the time being to become as fast as lightning . I am waiting . I am waiting in a waiting times . Haha . Wish me well okay ????? . Hahaha .

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Kisah 59 : What my heart wants

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